James Richardson has Sean Ingle, Barry Glendenning and James Horncastle on board for 46 minutes of Football Weekly aural pleasure.

We start with all the action from the Premier League, including Wayne Rooney's hat-trick and general sweariness, Sunderland's slide towards the relegation zone, and the unveiling of the highly tasteful Michael Jackson statue at Craven Cottage.

Next up, Sid Lowe tells us about the mood in Madrid ahead of Tottenham's visit to the Bernabéu in the Champions League just days after Real all but surrendered La Liga by losing 1-0 at home to Sporting Gijón (which was, remarkably, José Mourinho's first home defeat in nine years).

We finish up with an extended Serie A review, featuring a recap on the Milan derby, more on the match-fixing scandal, further revelations about footballers and their restaurant businesses and Saadi Gaddafi's colourful period in Serie A.

We're back on Thursday, so in the meantime, leave your feedback on the show on the blog below, and if you're that inclined, make sure you download a special podcast in which floating brain Jonathan Wilson heads to Poland to investigate whether the country's ready to host Euro 2012.